The Mixology craze is sweeping through major urban centers. We are thrilled with all the inventive new concoctions available to sample and numb us to the fact that homeland security is really an oxymoron...or a funny name for a drink. These are not days to walk around in any state other than a lightly buzzed stupor. With all those expert Mixologists out there, this is not difficult to achieve.

We just feel sorry for the poor suburban housewife who has been left in the dust. She ignorantly sips her Cosmopolitan during girls night out - nursing her fear that terrorists are specifically after her, while simultaneously commending the President for his huge handout to protect her off-the-map town. She has no idea that in cities that are actual targets, great drinks await her.

So while, the federal government takes money away from towns, like New York, and while the subways become more dangerous rather than more secure, we recommend a bar to hit for the perfect antidote to the backward ways of this country and to take the edge of your fears: